The past few weeks I’ve been in a bit of a funk, due most likely to a combination of things including, but surely not limited to, fluctuating hormones, lingering winter, and unsatisfying sleep. After a post-partum appointment with the district nurse last week that found me sort of unloading a bunch of stuff I didn’t know I was holding in and ended with her giving me a referral to a counselor, I decided that it was probably time to go back on the Zoloft. So I started back up with a low dose on Sunday, and I feel pretty good about that.

Actually, I feel pretty good all the way around. Really good, to tell you the truth, even though the Zoloft hasn’t had time yet to work its magic. What is working, I’m almost positive, is the fact that I’ve mostly cut out sugar. It wasn’t a conscious decision by any means — as much as I love to bake and to fika, there’s no way I’d do such a crazy thing on purpose. What happened is that last Saturday I had a really junky junk-food day and kind of grossed myself out with it, so on Sunday I didn’t feel like eating any goodies, even though I had just baked a batch of yummy lemon sugar cookies the day before. On Monday I still wasn’t in the mood for sweets, so I didn’t have any then, either. Nor on Tuesday.

Yesterday I woke up in the best mood I’ve been in for a long time and that mood lasted. I felt cheerful and calm and able to cope, and I had so much energy! I got to thinking back and realized I hadn’t had more than cursory amounts of sugar — a little in my latte, a teaspoon sprinkled over my Weetabix — since Saturday. That decided it for me, then. If such a little change could make such a big difference I was going to stick to it, especially since so far it hasn’t been painful in the slightest. I haven’t been even a little tempted by anything sugary for days now.

Don’t worry, though, I’m not going to any extremes. First, I don’t have the time or energy it would take to be completely hard-core about avoiding sugar. I mean, I’ve got five kids — do you know how hard it would be to tell them their Saturday candy was off the menu for good? Also, I really do like to bake. Remember, I make a pretty awesome birthday cake, and there’s no way I’m giving that kind of thing up. But the days of mindlessly eating cookies and cinnamon buns and chocolate just because they’re there? I think I’m done with that.